radiation the other white meat or is it all red! ?!

Well I had my set up meeting with the radiology oncologist today. I wonder where she's from, because she talks really really fast and she is just so go energy! Like a little cheerleader!  So they marked me and measured and tiny tattoos! All in an effort to make the forthcoming radiation therapy go more smoothly...they all seem very nice and competent. Which is good since it will be 5 days per week for 7 weeks... end of November... they keep saying I will be tired after about 3 weeks I just can't imagine it being as bad as chemo. Also moisturizing 4 times per day! (I will have to figure that out)... so there you go... still not sleeping well I am going to talk to Dr Harvey about that on the 20th.

Another sleepless night...

The problem is a pinched nerve "maybe"... heaviness in my chest when I lay back flat... when I sit up a little my shoulder hurts... so totally sitting up (not conducive to sleeping) this gets old...

Lifes little moments...

This year has been filled with those...those moments that make you look. Well you might say " look at what Lois" or " no kidding" But It has not been a journey for my life but a journey in my life. The difference is profound...when The women around me where afraid are afraid this is their end game, I am was saying/ feeling how incredibly annoying how inconvenient how disruptive to my life. and I still feel that way here nearing the end when I have just radiation left. I do believe there has got to be a better way to get through this!
 I will say I was/am over weight when this started but I exercised 5 days per week. I ate reasonably well. Now because of chemo I have pulmonary embolisms so breathing can be difficult and I am no on blood thinners because of that. I am anemic , which drains my energy. to get moving is a trial to keep moving a chore. during chemo I battled depression something that has never been an issue in my life. And other small things I never experienced that have become hurtles to overcome.
 The up side oddly for me has been the walking a mile in another man shoes. I understand now more about depression and having the will to overcome it. I understand when people say " I am just too tired" I even understand people with eating disorders because I have spent the last few months mostly forcing myself to eat, because nothing sounds or taste good ( which in my case is kind of a blessing). And of course how amazing the people in my life have been. I by nature am a loner which may surprise some of you given what I do for a living. It has always been easier for me to give than receive. I guess it makes me seem a much better person than I actually am. Having said that the out pouring of love has more than once (more than a dozen times) brought me to tears! Even that I analyze how did I not ever realize this before?
There are things I have changed in my life...some that will stay the same though I know they need to change...But I have learned much on this lump...a path I hope you never have to take and for those of you that have I salute you it sucks. For those of you that will you can get to the otherside.
I am looking forward to writing my last post in this blog...but until then thank you for sharing my journey.

On the other side of the mountain!

Got the all clear today! So a few weeks of healing then on to radiation. .. it feels like he said okay your. .. not done yet. .. you would think I would be all woo hoo! But I am more like cool what's next... am I crazy?

Attention! Important Notice! Lol!

Hi everyone!  I am sending out this note to let you know what is going on with me and working.
I have started picking Wednesdays back up but normally it will be a short day starting at noon.
Sunday, Monday & Tuesday noon to 7pm working later on request. 

I will hopefully start radiation the end of October. Which will be 5 days per week for 6 weeks. I am told I can get it done before work and that it may make me tired.
I am looking forward to this process being over!

  As of now I have had 2 breast surgeries.  One for the lump, the second because I did not have clean margins. I do not have the results from the second surgery as yet.
In conclusion I have more time on my books and am feeling really very good!  If you haven't been in on a while or if you are just due for your next visit I am looking forward to seeing you!  Text, email,  or call!

I am thankful to all of you for your support.
Lois

Day 2 back at work. ..

So work seems to be going well... I actually feel really good during the day. ... nighttime...that is a different story... breast aches, shoulder bites,  muscles hurt ...I lay down my chest is heavy... it seems to take forever to go to sleep! So I then take something... does it really help I am not sure... but I think I will have a shower, that always at least eases the sore....

Last night... work tomorrow!

So it's been a week and a day. I feel pretty good!  I was out and about most of the day.  So tomorrow I hit the ground running!  Fingers crossed! !!!

Almost human...

Well I just awoke again. I am hungry (that is new) my head seems clearer.  So I am going to get up and get something to eat and see how that goes.

Day 3 after surgery. ...

I have been in and out of drug induced sleep for the last 3 days. .. just now thawing out. .. Sore but not horrible.  body aches but I need to get around maybe that will right itself. ..I think I will shower,  maybe find something to eat...

Okay... and now it's today!

So it is almost 5am.  That is 4 hours since my last pain pill. Not that I won't take anymore,  at all... but not talking anymore tonight.
My breast hurts. But not so much at the moment I can't go back to sleep. So gonna try this, I don't have a good answer right now...

Heavy sedation and surgery. ..

At mom's! Hi everybody!  Sooo I had surgery (heavy sedation) boob hurt really horrible! Vertu different than when they put me under all the way!  I awoke from that feeling nothing. .. They kept giving narcotics and I asked if they could just numb it with out making me all heady. They said no. Which actually seems dumb! I have been sleeping all day (because of the drugs) Surgeon seems optimistic. And because I have no other option (I am gonna rinse and repeat ) for a couple days. ...

Things that make me smile. ..

Just life. ..

If wishes where kisses...

I wish I felt more myself.  I have to be grateful for the health I have,  but my boob hurts.  It is hard and aches.  Tomorrow I see the surgeon,  I am hoping that he had good answers to my questions and challenges.
Up side,  my grandson talked to me skype today Gave me tons of kisses!  He is so very cute!  It totally made my day!!!
If wishes where kisses.... I wish this journey was at an end. .. I really am over being tired. .. and hurting. .. but reality is I am getting better... 😄

A perfect day Or time in a bottle. ..

Wasn't that the line?  Something about time in a bottle?  It was a lovely day. Kelly talked about quiting smoking (woot woo) we road the streetcar its entire route round trip. We talked and had a lovely day. We read fun facts about Portland(not all of them accurate) we had fun just talking...

The weekend and Happy Labor day! !

Happy labor day all!  A whole lot of nowhere and nothing. Not been my best showing for a labor day weekend. But today should be an adventure!  Stay tuned I will write tonight. ...